Good Morning, Taylor,

This is a wierd day for me. I have nothing to do. I just read a new book for a little bit. I might watch a movie later. But for now, I have nothing to do. So I thought I’d write a little.

We have a week off this week due to a delay with Ragdoll’s new job. So we’re continuing our half days all week. Yesterday, I decided to do another hike to make up for the one I messed up on Saturday.

There wasn’t much to it. No big views. No surprise water spots. Just a large open trail in what seemed to be an old quarry with sparse trees. There was one or two spots with nice views, but in the end, it was a bit of a dreary trudge. But I did it. Three miles in two hours. This body isn’t in good shape, but I think it’s getting better.

I ran a few errands, continued to clean house, and then gave control over to Ragdoll so she could have her evening, and then her morning.

Today, though. She gave control over to me, and…there was nothing to do. The house was clean, she’d taken care of most all of the chores. I had to do dishes, and took some garbage out, but that took all of fifteen minutes.

It’s funny. I don’t know what to do with my spare time. I spent so much time being The Housekeeper that once the house was done, I had nothing more to do. My book wasn’t ready to pick up at the library. I thought maybe I should watch a movie. I asked ChatGPT for a suggestion, and it gave me Blade Runner and Ghost in the Shell based on my watching The Matrix and Dark City.

I have the time to live today. But for the life of me, I don’t know what to do.

I looked over Ragdoll’s bookshelf, and while they’re mostly art books or writing tutorials, there are a few fiction books here and there. I picked up one called High-Rise and spent a few hours reading it with some coffee. It’s very strange, but intriguing.

This is going to happen more and more often, I think. Ragdoll tells me that life is what happens between eating and sleeping. And now that I have life…I don’t know what to do with it yet. What do I want out of this new life? What should I do? Housekeeper isn’t a life, it’s a job. I would like to learn archery, but even that is less a life and more a hobby. Or maybe our hobbies are lives? Maybe that’s why Ragdoll is the way she is. She never figured out what she wanted from her life, and all she is are her jobs.

Tomorrow, if my book is delivered to the library, I’ll go visit town. Maybe I’ll see what other people are doing with their lives and find some purpose I want to work towards.

For now, I have exploration. I said the hike yesterday was dreary. But it wasn’t uneventful. I got to think a lot while on it. Mostly exploring the things around me like the trees and the views. Maybe that’s what I want. Exploration.

I should get dinner started, and then start my movie. I think it’s going to be Blade Runner.

–Andrea